In a recent discussion with a very good friend on the recent events that occurred with the senseless death of Trayvon Martin. We discussed the possible behaviors and thoughts that went into the shooting and subsequent death of Trayvon by Zimmerman. One of those thoughts being the stereotypes of young Black men that fit a 'profile' that lead others to think negatively about them and sometimes engage negatively with them. Our discussion expanded to the behaviors of Black women and the negative connotations that are so often attributed to us: angry, attitudes, bitches, etc. It was during this portion of the conversation that my friend quipped, "I can be the AVERAGE Black woman". She began to roll her head and demonstrate the stereotypical attitude behavior so often attributed to the Black woman. I quickly retorted, "You are the average Black woman!!!".
At that moment it occurred to me that as Black women we have bought into and accepted this notion of “Black women have attitudes", "Black women are angry". And although we accept it, some of us try to find a way to distance ourselves from this noted “fact” by stating, showing and/or convincing others why they are the EXCEPTION to this rule, including myself. In doing some research on the topic, I came across a Washington Post
article postulating that there is actually an 'upside' to being an Angry Black Woman. The article discussed a recent study conducted by the paper and a Foundation that concluded, "...while this
longstanding and
unfair stereotype is typically seen as a
negative one, standing in for abrasive, brash and even ill-tempered, it’s also consistent with
qualities we often associate with
leadership, such as being decisive, aggressive and resolute."
First, leadership in its basic definition means "the ability to influence others". Thus, anyone can be a leader or serve in a leadership role; however, what this article and study fail to address is the EFFECTIVENESS of the leadership. Second, the words decisiveness, aggressiveness, and resoluteness are NOT synonymous with abrasive, brash, and ill-tempered. Thus, to assert these qualities that are associated with leadership are also correlated with the "longstanding" and "stereotypical" qualities of the
Angry Black Woman is misleading and grossly inaccurate.
Another example of the erroneous characterization of the Black Woman only requires a few seconds of Googling the words "Angry White Women" and "Angry Black Women". When you Google Angry White Women you see mostly images of women with their faces scrunched up, lips pursed, fingers pointing. You Google Angry Black Women and you will find mostly 'normal' images of Black women, and even more disgusting several images of Michelle Obama, the First Lady of the United States (FLOTUS).
Yes, in our societal attempt to label the Black Woman as angry we have done a disservice to the FLOTUS, the President, and more importantly to the beautiful Black girls they are raising.
However, for those who are wise enough to not characterize the FLOTUS as an angry Black Woman do so by labeling her as the EXCEPTION, while labeling the women of the Real Housewives of Atlanta, Basketball Wives, and Love and Hip Hop as the RULE. Every time these shows air, there are thousands/millions of Black women sitting in front of their TV commenting, either trying to convince themselves they are in the EXCEPTION group or reveling in the possibility of being in the RULE group.
Here is my RULE perspective on the issue.
There are women in the world who get angry.
Some of these women stay in an angry state because their life is voluntarily or involuntarily consumed with angry inducing situations.
However, does this anger occur along racial lines? NO.
Is it more likely to occur in a particular race of women? MAYBE.
This can be due to both internal and external factors.
One factor can be as the Washington Post article stated this is a LONGSTANDING stereotype.
This belief can lead to Black women being treated both by our own and other races as if this is a fact and as such may respond accordingly.
As mentioned, Black women ourselves have accepted this stereotype.
A recent article discusses the firing of a Black female meteorologist on the basis on her responding to an online post questioning her low-cropped natural hairstyle.
The fired employee responded to the poster,
“
I am very proud of my African-American ancestry, which includes my hair. For your edification: traditionally our hair doesn’t grow downward. It grows upward. ..I’m very proud of who I am and the standard of beauty I display. Women come in all shapes, sizes, nationalities, and levels of beauty. Showing little girls that being comfortable in the skin and HAIR God gave me is my contribution to society…“Conforming to one standard isn’t what being American is about and I hope you can embrace that…“Thank you for your comment and have a great weekend and thank [you] for watching.”
An individual commenting on the firing and the comments that were made, had this to say,
“
Read this article over very carefully... As a 40 year old woman that has grown her natural hair, thinks that she was wrong to "take it personally" I truly believe that "Emmitt" did not consciously try to put down African Americans.
I only hope that this challenging lesson the Ms. Lee will all work out. Maybe it was time for her to move on to a better opportunity, for something so trivial as different opinions …In short…I think Ms. Lee was offended and angry and took matters into her own hands. (Not always the best idea…speaking from experience).
Considering the original post was directed towards the Black female meteorologist how could she NOT take it personally about an opinion that was personal (not trivial, has stated in the comments) to her.
Why would another Black woman comment on Ms. Lee as being ANGRY?
Is it due to our own conditioning as Black women of Black women being angry or was this an opportunity for the commenter to distance herself as an EXCEPTION to the RULE of the angry Black Women who in this situation wear their hair natural?
Iyanla Vanzant encourages individuals to “Call a Thing, a Thing”.
The thing that needs to be called out here is the grossly misrepresentation of the Black Woman that has gone on for far too long and Black Women fighting this misrepresentation by developing an US vs THEM…EXCEPTION vs. RULE mentality.
No, I DO NOT think the RHOA, Basketball Wives, Love and Hip Hop women are the RULE of the Black Woman. I think they are the EXCEPTION.
Are there women who act this way, absolutely; however, it is not due to their race which is clearly demonstrated in the other Housewives, Mob Wives, and other non-reality tv shows. We are all capable of allowing anger to RULE over our behavior, to suggest somehow Black Women are predisposed to this behavior and more likely to act this way needs to STOP now and it starts with US…The M.A.D. (Making A Difference) Black Woman.
